The Truth Sucks
by Sahara-1497
Summary: No this is not the same one as on AFF.NET I changed it to work with Yu-Gi-Oh! basically it's YYY but not really...read it apparently it's good!


This is just a personal response to something that happened to me. And all I wanted to do was get it out. So here it is.

Title: The Truth Sucks!

Rating: R (for language and other things) M/F (somewhat of a sex scene) M/M (it's just a kiss!)

Sorry there is no sex scene it's just kinda implied sorta.

Disclaimer: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh! Want to but don't!

Normally I would ask you to review but hey....If you want to cool if not alrighty then.

The Truth Sucks!

By: Sahara

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Waking up seemed very difficult today so I didn't even want to get out of bad because something told me it was going to be a bad day.

Looking at my clock and attempting to roll out of bed, I see its noon. I get up and throw on my black leather pants and a black top. Still tired I fall backwards onto my bed. Within minutes my gandpa bursts into my room I jump up.

"Get dressed and come downstairs. We need to have a serious talk."

I realize that he probably think I'm still wearing p.j.'s.

"About what? Am I in trouble?" My head is zooming. What happened? Who did what? Who's hurt? Am I in trouble?

"Depends on your answers." He turns out my door and walks out.

Depends on my answers? What the fuck is that supposed to mean? Horrible thoughts and images zoom through my mind. My best friend dead on a sidewalk somewhere, the car getting totaled, my friends finding out that I'm gay, my yami dead.

I quickly throw a gray vest over the top and go into the bathroom. Looking at my self in the mirror I see everything crashing around me and have no lifelines to help me out of the crisis I'm about to thrown headlong into. I want to run upstairs curl up under my sheets and pretend nothing is wrong. Nothing is happening and I will always be safe in the heat of my bed.

I should have listened to my gut and went back up but I can't stop that now.

I walked downstairs every possible bad thing rushing though my thoughts. Horrible images bleed into each other creating a river of blood flowing harshly and breaking the damn of my sanity.

I'm about to crack but nothing can prepare me for what I'm about to hear.

My grandpa informs me that my friend Ryou is in the hospital and isn't feeling well (which is horrible in its own way but not what I had pictured).

I explode. I start to attack never letting up until I'm satisfied.

"You make me think that my best friend is dead! That the World is going to crash around me! Don't you ever do something like that again!"

Unfortunately that doesn't seem to be what was causing him so much anguish. He continues and tells me that's not what he wanted to talk to me about.

Then I find out....the truth. And it **Sucks!**

Tea Garner the one that seemed so trustworthy and seemed to understand everything about me was a liar! She pretended to be my friend and set me up into situations I'm not entirely sure I wanted to be in.

I hurt. More then anything else I have every experienced. I want out. I need out. It hurt so much.

So I run and keep running. I don't know where I'm going I just know I need to get away. I reach my special place. It's not really special but it is to me. It's a spot surrounded by trees with a large rock directly in the center. I hit the tree as hard as I can.

I crack open the skin on my knuckles but I don't care. Nothing could compare to the pain I have inside my mind; a dark room with no light but a small red one streaking past my face. I have nothing. I have no one.

I continue to punch the tree. As each gets bloody I move to the next one. My knuckles crack against the rough tree bark and my knuckles bruise and scar.

I know I'm taking this harsh but why am I so fucking gullible! Everybody seems to want to hurt me or use me.

Oh My God! That bitch. She was running a whore house and I was in the middle of it. He went there for her and in the end got me.

_#Flashback#_

_I was drinking. Not really heavily because today it just tastes gross. Maybe it's the fact that its cheep beer._

_Eric already has his tongue down my throat. It's kinda gross but hey it's better then nothing. He's already hard. I can feel it push against my leg. But I'm a virgin and I don't want to give it away like this. But then the other two want to fuck and I'm tired. So Eric leads me upstairs. All I want to do is sleep. I didn't do any of the drugs they offered. I'm not that kinda guy but he lead me upstairs to go and sleep, at least that's what I want to do._

_I'm not really drunk and if I am this isn't how I normally am I'm usually giddy and really affectionate. But I want to sleep so I crawl onto the bed and lay down._

_I feel him lay down next to me and cuddles up to me practically humping my leg. I didn't acknowledge him I just pretended to sleep cause I was on the verge of it anyway._

_--A little Later--_

_I wake up feeling sharp pains between my legs. I feel myself being drawn back then pushed forward into the mattress. I'm tired and want to go back to sleep. Then I clue in. He couldn't wait like he said he would when he found out I was a virgin._

_It hurts and I want it to end. Finally I feel him thrust once more. And it hurt._

_I cry softly. My precious virginity has been taken from me. I'm still tired so I fall asleep._

_-- Around 5am. --_

_I wake up and see the pervert beside me. I slowly get up and he wakes. He asks me to kiss him. So I do and his tongue is down my throat again. I notice he's hard again so I quickly get up. He looks up at me seductively._

_"You do that to me and now you're leaving?"_

_I simply shrug. You asshole you fuck me in the middle of the night while I'm sleeping and expect me to do it again._

_I find it hard to walk as I make the long journey down the stairs and over to my house._

_#End Flashback#_

I gave away my virginity for that whore to have some money! Well at least she was able to by more fucking drugs!

I walk away from the place. And start to walk home. I don't pay attention I mean why should I?

I run into Yami. At least I know I can count on him. I almost fall onto the pavement when he catches me. He slowly helps me down to sit on the curb. He puts his arm around my shoulders looking into my darkened eyes.

With every punch I gave to the trees a piece of ice laced itself around my heart. It seems as though that hatred has spread to my eyes. I look at him harshly though I don't mean to. He pulls my head to his chest.

"Let it out." So I do.

I cry. The damn that holds all the pain from everything, my friend's problems, my grandpa's, mine, everything that's gone wrong in my life, my feelings toward him, breaks. I'm broken and the only thing keeping the pieces is him. I cry out my problems and he doesn't seem to mind I've officially soaked his shirt.

He rubs soothing circles on my back as I continue to cry. He sends a rushing river of warm watery love into my heart chipping the ice. I look up at him not caring that I probably look like hell.

"I-"A finger is pushed to my lips in order to silence me.

"You don't have to tell me. Here I'll walk you home."

He takes my hands in his and notices the bloody knuckles with little skin left on them. He rips off the sleeves and ties them around my hands not noticing the small blush forming on my cheeks. He then lifts me to my feet and I walk home. I tell him anyway well most of it. I inform him about my loss of virginity and flinch expecting him to laugh.

He lifts my chin with two of his fingers and gently kisses my lips. I'm shocked he liked me too! But before I could respond he pulls away.

"I can't give it back to you. And I can't take away what happened but don't become the person I saw. Don't be the person that doesn't let anyone in. Please."

I nod knowing that if I say anything I'll just end up crying again. I reach my house and he gives me a hug lifting me gently. He carries me to my bedroom and lays me down on my bed. I smile sadly and softly thank him.

It's hard. And even though he helped me I have my inner demons to face and my self inflicted damage. I look down at the shirt cover knuckles.

I close my eyes and see the room. I see blood and a black ugly demon in the corner. He attempts to come near me and almost touches me but stops. Frozen in his tracks I look down and see a very thin circle surrounding me. It's a crimson red, his eye and favorite colour.

I smile softly. I don't want to open my eyes. I like being protected in the circle that comfort me like his arms. I don't want to see real demons the one that's only a few inches away from me, even though ugly, seems like on of the nicest people I could meet.

I tell myself that even if it's horrible and hard I can make it better.

I open my eyes and see the reality I have to face. I know that the truth sucks, and so does this life. It's over and yet it's just beginning.

I'm betting you all are going to tell me it sucks and I should grow up. Or maybe you want to tell me I'm over reacting. So go ahead. My life can't get much worse right now. And if you've ever been one of those people who have been used... well you probably know how I feel.

I don't mean to turn away my fans. But I'm having a really hard time right now and will update my fics as soon as I feel better. Which shouldn't be too long......(no that's not a good thing)


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